Latest Event Updates
I’ll admit, I have a lot of hate and anger inside of me. I can’t help it. When I see people I love being wronged, or when I’m wronged, I can’t help but feel it’s incredibly unfair. But it consumes you, changes you. You become obsessed with it, you feel the anger in every fibre of your body. And most importantly: it’s not healthy.
How are you supposed to live a satisfying life if all you’re thinking about is anger and hate? You need to process your emotions, validate them, and eventually file them away to move on. But here’s the million dollar question: how?
Forgive them—or at least forget
Maybe what they did to you was really shitty. Maybe it was unforgivable. But hating them isn’t going to change anything: all it will achieve is making you feel worse. Don’t let them win. Forgive them, because they don’t know better—or if you can’t, forget, and move on. Because really, when you forgive them, you’re really forgiving yourself and allowing yourself to let the hate go.
We’re human: we make mistakes
Remember that. Maybe things were said and done in the heat of the moment. Maybe they regret it, and maybe they don’t. But it’s important to realise we all make mistakes. Why should we hold a small mistake against someone? If you were in the same position, you’d want them to be gracious towards you.
Don’t live in the past
I know it’s hard. I know you’re probably obsessing over it. I know any slight mention makes your blood boil, and your chest heat with an overwhelming sense of injustice and rage. No matter what you do, you can’t fix the past. And even if you do get some form of revenge, it won’t make you any happier, and it won’t change what happened.
Open yourself to the future
Use that rage to fuel your passions. If anything, kill them with success. The best revenge, after all, is success. Open your heart. Try new things. Take one step at a time to make your dreams come true.
Allow yourself to feel
If someone has done something terrible to you, you have a right to feel angry—so don’t feel like a bad person for it. But, like with any emotional experience, you need to address it the right way. Don’t bottle it up—talk to loved ones, a therapist, or even write. You need to process your emotions, validate them, and let it go.
Learn from your experiences
Think of it as a learning curb—think about the kind of person you want to be. Think about how you want to be treated—and treat others that way. Every adversity has a lesson to teach us—and we must be stronger than it.
Send them love
Generally, if people do bad things, there’s a reason: they’re damaged or they too have been wronged somehow. That isn’t fair, and it doesn’t justify their actions, but it does explain them. Maybe getting revenge and making them feel bad will make you feel momentarily superior. But in the long run, it will only make things worse. Life goes on, and hate only breeds more hate. Don’t let it eat you up from the inside.
Replace it with something you love
Negative voice in your head? Obsessing over words said to you? Keep repeating the incident over and over? Replace it with something else. Something you enjoy, something you love, something that makes you happy. Let your happy memories set you free.
Think about what I’ve written. Acknowledge your feelings. When anger strikes, remember you deserve more than a hate-filled heart. The world has enough hate in it—it doesn’t need any more. Let yourself move on—it will free you.
Care for yourself
You are number one. Do things you love. Get a massage, have a bath, get a manicure, do a hair mask, drink a glass of wine, read a book, watch your favourite shows and eat your favourite, nutritious food. Always put yourself first, and surround yourself with positive people who will help and love you.
Do the clichés
Scream into a pillow. Go to the gym and work up a sweat. Write an angry letter, and tear it up or burn it. Get all your emotions out in a positive way that isn’t hurtful. We don’t need more hurt in the world.
We aren’t always innocent, and maybe things could have been handled better. But you always—no matter what—need to forgive and love yourself. You are strong. You are a good human. Be the change you want to see in the world, and who knows: maybe if you respond with love instead of hate, you’ll change someone’s world.
Why are we so afraid to call it rape?
Rape culture is very real and very dangerous—but Orange is the New Black isn’t afraid to tackle it. In the latest season of the hit Netflix series, we see conceptions of rape addressed—and reformed—through the characterisation of inmate Tiffany Doggett.
Doggett was raped last season by a commanding officer at Litchfield Penitentiary—a man who was supposed to be responsible for her safety. Instead, officer Charlie Coates took advantage of her and raped her: but it wasn’t how we usually see rape represented on screens. Doggett wasn’t screaming. She wasn’t frantically trying to beat him off. But we could see from her face that she desperately didn’t want to be there. It doesn’t matter if she didn’t fight tooth and nail to stop him—or even if she didn’t tell him: it is still rape.
This season, Doggett confronts Coates, making sure he’s not raping anyone else. But here’s the kicker: he didn’t even know he’d raped her. “But I love you,” he insists. “It’s different.”
“But it didn’t feel any different,” Doggett responds.
It didn’t feel any different because it isn’t—rape is the unwanted penetration of oral, vaginal or anal cavities. So, why are we so afraid to call it that? We live in a society where we’re so focussed on blaming the victim: what did they do to provoke it? What were they wearing? Were they drinking? Had they slept together before? Were they in love? Where they in a relationship? Why didn’t they yell for help? People voice these questions as if any of these factors negate a heinous crime. Newsflash: it doesn’t.
One in six women and 1 in 33 men will be raped within their lifetimes. One in two transgender persons will be sexually assaulted, as well as 44% of lesbian women, 26% of gay men, and 61% of bisexual women and 37% of bisexual men. This is a major problem—yet instead of tackling these issues, we’re too focussed on blaming the victim.
As a woman, I’m afraid to walk home alone at night—even though my bus stop is only 500m away. As a woman, I am afraid when a group of men walk towards me. As a woman, I make sure I’m not too drunk to keep my wits about me. I make sure my dress isn’t too short. I make sure I don’t lead anyone on—and even then, I’m not safe.
Doggett was raped in a prison environment meant to protect her.
Our actions do not give another person permission to so much as touch us. Even if I walked down the street naked, I’m still not “asking for it”—because my body is mine, and every human being deserves that right. But some people still don’t seem to get the concept of “no”.
Maybe you loved them. Maybe you knew they were horny, so you just let them do it. Maybe you did try to stop it, but gave in because it was easier than fighting. Maybe there were tears in your eyes, as you stare at the wall, wishing you were anywhere else. Maybe you cried when it was over and they were asleep or gone. Maybe they did love you. But then, maybe they didn’t. Maybe it was a cruel and vicious crime—and actions or intentions don’t change that.
As women, we’re so programmed to feel like we have to please our partners—even if we don’t want to. But love is not an excuse for rape: nothing is. And this line of thinking, this notion of “oh, you can’t call it rape after it happened” is absolute bullshit, and a massive cultural problem. Maybe you were too scared to speak up—maybe you’re too afraid to confront in your own mind what it was, and only realise what it was later. It is “not making it up” to get someone in trouble—because only one in six rapes are reported, and only 17% of rapes are actually convicted.
Rape affects every facet of your life. It restricts your sexuality. It restricts your chance at future relationships. You lay awake, crying and reliving those moments. You flinch at every rape joke, or mention of sexual assault. This is not okay.
But we live in a society that would rather blame the victim than prosecute the victim. But it is not the victim’s fault—it’s the rapist’s fault.
Rape is an unforgivable crime—and we need to stop sugar coating it.
Roses are red, violets are blue. If you were a Pokémon, I’d choose you.
Hey girl, let me get a Pikachu Jigglypuffs.
Do you want to battle? Because my balls are at the ready.
I am ready, baby.
I’d like to ride you like a Horsea.
You have such a way with words.
My Gyrados is big enough for you to ride it all day and all night.
Now we’re talking.
Do you want to play with my Poke Balls?
Are they clean?
Want to watch my Ekans evolve?
Do I ever?!
I wish you were the ground and I were a Diglett so I could be inside of you.
STD’s are like Pokemon: gotta catch ‘em all. Help me out?
Gotta catch ‘em alllllllll!
Do you want to go back to my gym and have a naked battle?
Only if your level is big enough.
Ay baby, are you a Vulpix? Because you’re a sexy fox.
Take me now.
Looking at your ass makes my bulba soar.
I often have that effect.
Hi, my name’s cock. I mean Brock.
Hi, my name is no. I mean no. No.
Can I Squirtle on your Jigglypuffs?
I have no response.
The Federal Election can be a very confusing time—especially if you’re not really sure what to do, who to vote for, or what the major parties are even saying. It can be pretty overwhelming—particularly researching what it is you want to find. Here’s a guide on what the major parties are saying to help you decide:
- Stronger animal welfare standards and legislation with tougher penalties.
- Ending unnecessary use of animals for testing and education.
- Clear definitions of “free range eggs”.
- Abolish animals in circuses.
- Ban the slaughter of whales, greyhound racing, recreational shooting, selective breeding, race jumping and shark culling.
- Stop the importation and exportation of zoo animals unless it will assist the continuation of the species.
- Establishment of a national animal welfare body.
- More power given to RSPCA and animal cruelty investigations.
- Plans for habitat management, species loss, and protecting native plants and animals.
- Ratify international environmental law.
- End broad-scale clearing.
- Increase educational resources.
- Cleaner oceans and protect costal zones.
- Ban dumping and creation of new coal mines.
- Detailed emission targets each year until 2050.
- Net zero or net negative emissions within a generation.
- 100% stationary electricity to be sustainable as soon as possible.
- Renewable energy implementation and research.
- Aim for a nuclear-free world.
- Cease uranium mining and exportation.
- Eliminate nuclear weapons.
- Banks to make greater contribution to public purse through taxes and levies.
- Minimise ATM fees.
- Programs introduced to improve Australian financial literacy.
- Tax and superannuation reforms to benefit low-income earners.
- Reduce excessive executive salaries.
- Housing affordability and availability.
- Stronger protection of worker’s rights.
- Protection for casual and fixed-term probationary workers.
- Childcare incentives.
- Paid parental leave scheme.
- Minimum of 5 weeks leave for all employees.
- Shorter standard working hours.
- Expenditure increase of 3% to support science and technology research.
- End criminalisation of consensual sex work.
- Protection of journalism sources and regional independent media.
- Ratify international human rights legislation.
- Global disbarment strategies and promotion of non-violence.
- Close foreign defence bases within Australia.
- Stronger support for the International Criminal Court and the International Court of Justice.
- Reform restrictive “counter-terrorism” legislation.
- End global death penalty.
- More funding for schools based on equity.
- More infrastructure and specialised teachers.
- Free university education
- 16 and 17-year-olds can vote.
Health and mental health:
- Universal publically-funded Medicare
- Universal access to public dental care
- Funding for mental health services.
- Anti-vilification disability laws.
- Ban of junk food advertisements on children’s television.
- Decriminalise abortion.
- Legalise the right to die.
- Allow same-sex marriage.
- Equal access to adoption, fostering and assisted reproduction regardless of sex, sexual orientation or marital status.
- Transgender rights.
- Remove religious exemption for anti-discrimination laws.
- Create commissioner for sexuality, gender and intersex rights with the Australian Human Rights Commission.
- More funding to domestic violence and women’s shelters.
- End the gender wage gap.
Workplace and tourism:
- $20 million in funding to protect vulnerable workers.
- Tax cuts for small businesses.
- Tax incentives for innovative start-ups.
- $23 million investment for small businesses.
- Trans-pacific trade agreement and free trade with Indonesia, the European Union and Pacific Islands.
- $20 million investment for infrastructure for tourist regions.
- Planting 20 million new trees by 2020.
- $70 million investment for green spaces.
- $30 million to support local parks.
- Emissions reduction fund.
- $15,000 to community groups for renewable resources.
- $5 million to a threatened species recovery fund.
- $3 billion to invest in the Great Barrier Reef and clean water over 10years.
- $100 million aim per year for Smart Cities program.
- Additional $60 million in funding for sport programs.
- STEM funding of $73.6 billion over 4 years.
- $4.6 million for alternate education pathways.
Technology and science:
- A further $60 million to upgrade or create 499 new telephone bases to tackle an additional 3,000 mobile phone service black spots.
- $50 million to the MyGov website.
- $7 billion in funding for clinical trials.
- $650 million in 4 years for medical funding, including $20 million for childhood cancers.
- $1.1 billion for the National Innovation and Science Agenda.
- $2.5 billion boost to law enforcement and security.
- $1 billion to strengthen borders.
- $40 million Safer Communities Fund,
- $37.3 billion investment for education.
- Girls Into Code initiative with $4.5 million in grants.
- Safer Schools program of $6 million over 3 years.
- Increase in child care benefits for low-income earners.
- $50 million to support family day care systems.
- $31 million funding for tertiary education.
- Additional funding for undergraduates.
- Restore medicare benefits.
- Legalise medical cannabis.
- Give citizens the right to die.
- $72 million funding for mental health.
- $7 million for breast cancer, $10.6 million for prostate cancer.
- $25 million for dementia research.
Climate Change and Environment:
- $500 million to the Great Barrier Reef.
- 50% renewable energy by 2030.
- Net zero pollution by 2050.
- $17.4 million in funding for Climate Change Authority.
- Ban cosmetic testing.
- More investigations and sanctions to breaches.
- Establishment of animal welfare body.
- NBN to premises.
- $400 million Western Sydney rail package.
- $1.2 million National Cycling Strategy.
- High-speed rail between Brisbane and Melbourne via Sydney and Canberra.
- Protect weekend penalty rates.
- $4.5 million for Fair Work Commission.
- No baby bonus.
- Paid parental scheme leave.
- Tax reductions for small businesses.
- Crack down on multinationals.
- More jobs and courses available.
- Creative Australia Policy.
- Building 12 submarines in South Australia.
Gender and sexuality:
- Marriage equality.
- $70 billion to family violence services.
- $8.4 million investment for indigenous girls.
- Paid parental violence leave of 5 days.
- More coverage for women’s sport with $21 million in funding to the ABC.
Despite all of these lovely promises, there’s no promises they will be put into place. I would encourage each and every one of you to think for yourselves–and to do your research: because your vote matters.
I feel for our dairy farmers—I really do.
I can’t imagine how it would feel to have everything you’ve ever known dwindle around you. To have your livelihoods rendered worthless. To be thrown into unfair debt. I have no doubt that dairy farmers have the best intentions—and maybe some of them really do look after their animals. But even so: dairy is a destructive industry, where animals are objectified as means to an economic end—and this isn’t okay.
Before you abuse me, take a moment to consider my words—humour me.
Let’s think about the practicality of dairy and how we actually get milk—cows don’t just magically produce it: it results from pregnancy. Like humans, cows carry their young for nine months. Unlike humans, most cows will have their young taken away within 12-14 hours after birth due to their economic strain. Calves less than 30 days old—known as bobby cows—will often be sent to the slaughterhouse. In Australia, this is around 400,000 calves per year. This “cruel separation” is a traumatic experience, destined to be repeated over and over for a cow’s workable lifetime— every 13 months. These calves will never even taste their mother’s milk.
There are 1.6 million dairy cows in Australia. While cows will naturally live around 20 years, cows in the dairy industry are only expected to live around seven to eight years. Australian cows also produce around 5730L of milk per year—which is incredible, as the average is only 2900L. Our farmers are struggling, and no matter how beloved certain cows may be, farmers simply need to get as much as they can from their livestock. But is money worth these drastic measures?
Speaking of drastic measures, let’s talk about industry standards. Yes, there are standards—and yes, they’re a lot better than a lot of other countries. They do genuinely try to provide better lives and treatment for cows in terms of welfare. But some aspects are still quite barbaric, such as dehorning and castration. Dehorning is a common practise for male and female cows, which involves sensitive tissue being sawn off. Castration, while considered a major operation for older bulls, can be done to males younger than six months by anyone—no matter how inexperienced. Shockingly, there are no laws required for pain relief.
Is cruelty and objectification not enough to convince you of a change of heart? Well, let’s look at health factors.
For decades, we’ve been fed the idea that dairy is best—that we need it. But consider who would have encouraged this propaganda: that’s right, the for-profit dairy industry. Yes, dairy is the source of calcium and other vitamins, but to put it bluntly: it’s not meant for us. It’s meant for a rapidly growing baby calf.
Dr Mark Hyman said consuming dairy is actually not in our best interests, and that we’ve been force-fed many ideas that are not factual. For instance, milk doesn’t reduce fractures—it may actually increase the risk of them by 50%. By consuming five to seven portions of fruits and veggies per day (and no animal products), a person can reduce their risk of heart disease by 47%, strokes by 26%, and cancer by up to 18%. Furthermore, about 75% of the population is lactose intolerant. Know why?
Because. We’re. Not. Meant. To. Drink. Another. Animal’s. Milk.
Think about it. Think about what they’re not telling you. Do you think animals should be used purely for economic gain? Even if you don’t think it’s wrong for them to be killed for our consumption, I’d like to think that—as reasonable agents—we can agree that cows should at least be treated well—starting with stricter industry standards and better policing. Even if they’re going to be slaughtered, at the very least, they should live fulfilling lives.
Does this make you feel sad? Do you wish things were different? Well, they can be—and you can help. Change begins with education. Even one mind changed can start a revolution. As it is, we don’t need dairy—there are plenty of plant-based sources of calcium, like dark leafy greens, beans, pulses, nuts, brown bread, enriched fruit juice, plant-based milks, soy mince, tofu and so on. Dairy is dwindling—the number of farms in the last two decades has decreased by two thirds. Maybe there’s a reason for it.
Dairy farmers, I feel sorry for you—that you’ve been brought into this war and are struggling. That you’re only paid 37 cents for a litre of milk, despite it costing 38 cents to produce. But instead of supporting our farmers by buying their product, why don’t we encourage them and donate to them to create new and sustainable livelihoods—livelihoods that don’t rely on forced slavery.
Some things are meant to change—and I for one choose compassion.
I don’t feel comfortable. Maybe it’s my anxiety, but I’m not so sure. My palms are sweaty. My breathing escalates. I feel their eyes on me. You don’t belong here, they snicker.
I pause. Well . . . Why don’t I belong here?
I’m talking about my recent visits to various comic book and gaming stores. Now, I love gaming. I’ve loved it ever since Sonic the Hedgehog came out on Sega, followed by the Crash Bandicoot and Spyro games on PlayStation1, various PlayStation 2 games, and now my PlayStation 4. I’ve gleefully wasted countless hours of my life mashing buttons and yelling with glee at the screen. I’ve finished my favourite games multiple times, and if I’m ever not responding to Facebook messages, it’s probably because I’m gaming—can’t talk, killing zombies. But for some reason, whenever I visit a nerdy store—filled with things I love dearly and would gladly spend my money on—the eyes of other patrons tell me I don’t belong.
Is it because I’m a woman?
Is it because I don’t “look like a gamer”?
Is it because I wear pretty floral dresses and bright red lipstick?
Is it because I wing my eyeliner sharp enough to cut the haters, have my nails done and carry cute handbags?
Whenever I go into these stores, I feel like I have to justify myself. I have to prove I like these things. I have to prove I’m not a poser. Because obviously, my appearance is directly linked to what things I can and can’t enjoy, and how good I am at said things.
It is not posing when a female enjoys games, anime, comic books or other like things. Believe it or not, we’re not trying to act cool to impress boys (or girls). Here’s a crazy idea: maybe we enjoy it—just like you.
Instead of judging and hating each other, we should be promoting acceptance, love, and mutual enjoyment of cool and quirky things. After all, aren’t we the same geeks that were (most likely) picked on in school? Teased for liking things that weren’t the norm? Stereotyped as nerds and weirdos?
I am a nerd. I am a geek. I’m a weirdo. And I’m a girly girl. But you know what? I’m proud of that. I love these things, and I can’t wait to experience more. And if you’re ever tempted to judge someone else, maybe you should take a good hard look at yourself. Stop looking at me with those eyes. I do belong here—F off. I can’t hear you over the sound of me winning, anyway.